God has been teaching me and forcing me to grow so rapidly in the last four months. However I chide myself for saying that. In all honesty, he’s been doing this for the past 3 years. And more! I just couldn’t see it at the time.
Three years ago I entered boot camp. It was tough and I hated it. I let God know that I hated it, but I still wanted his will for me. Four months ago, I entered God’s army as a soldier and God has continued my training. However he’s doing so in very different ways.
Boot camp was very much like a college class. Book learning. But now that I’m in the military, God’s calling me to do the hard stuff. It’s time to step out and trust that what I’m hearing actually is his voice.
This week I’ve come to a crossroads. A decision has been weighing on my mind for months, now that I think about it. But I’ve sensed in my spirit that the time is drawing nearer to take a step, lest my hesitance cause more harm than good:
Two roads diverged in a wood
And I didn’t know which to choose.
One was paved with cobblestone
And another with dirt was strewn.
I contemplated at the fork,
Not knowing what to do.
Pacing, nervous, back and forth.
Stood frozen, couldn’t move.
I’d been down one of them before,
But stepped off half the way.
I marveled at the stable stone,
And was uneasy just the same.
The other one was malleable.
It’s path lay there exposed.
What if I left my footprints there,
Turning halfway through?
Either path could bring me joy.
With neither one I’d lose.
Both could lead to God’s good grace,
Only one could I choose.
I cannot walk both roads alone,
Each stuck in my shoes.
Dirt or rocks would leave with me–
To mix would hurt the roads.
So here I find myself at night,
Waiting for the dark to pass.
My tour guide arrives at down
To help me choose a path.
I’ll make a camp here at the fork,
And keep my distance back.
Until my ranger takes my hand
And helps me chose a track.
For years this has been my chosen mode of life. No action. No drama. Unfortunately that life is not sustainable. Jesus did not come on this earth to teach us to sit and stay. He taught us to jump, speak, roll over. He taught us to fetch and lead.
Waiting has its place. Wisdom and guidance, prudence, are traits to be desired. But once that morning light rises on the other side of the trees, it’s time to act. No more sitting around.
Acting can be scary. It will be scary. Especially if you’re traveling down an unfamiliar road. But as long as your heart is set on Him, as long as your desire is to serve the Lord Jesus and remain within His will, He will not let you slip and fall. And you’ll come out the other side better and stronger than you were when you went in.